Filed under: random
How many “me”s are there?
Do you have that many, too?
You know, there is…
me – the mom – who has to have the answers, never lose her temper, not care that my kids feelings and wants are automatically ahead of mine (not something I mind in the grand scheme of things, but there are days…), always have the right answer to get the message across to moody, hormone driven children…
me – the student – where the intellectual world and scientific inquiry takes precedence over anything and everything else.
me – the pastor’s wife – again, with all the answers, supposed to be a mature, wise person – solid Christian – never doubt, always know where God is leading, spiritual things always at the forefront of every thought and decision
me – the wife – I really suck at this one. My husband’s needs should come before mine, I should be attentive to what he needs and jump to help him, take off all the burden I can… which I agree, were I a good wife I would be better at seeing these things. The problem is, I find myself so buried, I don’t see through my pile of crap to see what I could do for the rest of my family.
But really… it all drowns out ME.
Sadly – I’m not sure who that is, who I want it to be or how I would go about finding her.
What do I want? OK, wrong question… What does God want from me? See, I *know* the right question – I’m just not always sure it is the question I WANT to ask. At the very least, I’m not sure I want to hear and abide by the answer. Pretty much I’m selfish. I want what I want – and yes, I want it now. Oh yeah, but I’m not even sure what it is I want…
Well if this isn’t a circular, random, pointless post. Point or no, it is what it is.
Here is my song… still trying to figure it out, but I can really relate to the song…
